I’ve been listening to your videos on YouTube and I’m so grateful for the valuable information you share.
I am a religious Jewish woman and very family-oriented. I got married at 23 which was over 2 years ago. There has been too much unsureness & insecurity & we recently got divorced.
I don’t even believe in divorce – not that it’s a religion – but basically I think there’s always something that can be done or worked on. I’d never believe that I’d go through it, & with our 1 & 1/2-year-old, but I realized so much negativity can be too much.
I’d like to be with the right person G-d willing, but aside from having a good time dating & good company how can one ensure that the person is of high value & will be lovingly there for them in the long run?
Thanks a million.
Yvonne (name changed for privacy)
How can one “ensure that the person is of high value & will be lovingly there for them in the long run?” One can’t. However, we can up the odds of entering into a positive and long-lasting marriage.
The two separate components of doing so are first, finding the best person and then second, making the union work. In God’s Biblical blueprint, neither Adam nor Eve were given choices. God didn’t parade a choice of women before Adam like an early MIss Eden contest. Neither did He allow Eve the option of looking at Adam and saying, “Hmm….really? That’s it? Could You maybe show me another one?” The emphasis in the elemental model of marriage was on what happened after the wedding rather than on the process of choosing.
Nowadays, it is not so simple; partially because to some extent, we are all greatly influenced by a deteriorated culture around us, and indeed, some of us are damaged. For that and other reasons, choosing wisely is now an increasingly important part of the process of building a lifelong marriage.